Oh-Em-Gee! Are you WATCHING this??

Oh my goodness!  I just finished watching The Bachelorette, and the best part was the last hour when they brought on Jake and Vienna to hash out their very public and scandalous break up.  And when I say the best part, I mean the most painful, train-wreckish part that I couldn't stop watching.  And if you don't know who Jake and Vienna are, Jake was the most recent Bachelor and Vienna was the girl who won a proposal from him.  And if you don't know what The Bachelor is, click the word Bachelor.  (Or, you may just want to come back and read this post after you find a way off that island you've been stuck on.)


Apparently, Vienna (silly girl) was under the impression that since he was a pilot, they would move back to Texas (where he was from), set up house, and she would live the regular life of a pilot's wife.  (Did anyone see that movie?  Because I didn't.  If I had seen it, I would make a funny quip about it here.)


Anyway, I guess she was sadly mistaken because unbeknownst to her, his plan was to move to Hollywood and become a star.  Or 'fame whore' as she so delicately puts it.  Whatever.  Tomato, Tomahto, right?


Anyway, ABC in their infinite wisdom, puts an hour long interview with the ex-couple on after an hour of The Bachelorette. (It's the story of a woman looking for love by traveling around the world and dating multiple men at once.  Basically, the same thing I'm doing, but I'm not on tv.  That's the only difference between that show and my life.) This interview was the most uncomfortable thing I've seen since the final few episodes of Jon and Kate Plus Eight, where the miserably out-of-love parents had a birthday party for the sextuplets, but were fuming under their breath at each other the whole time.  AWKWARD.  (Yes, I watched it.  Don't judge.  I have degrees in Psychology and an uncontrollable fascination with human behavior and motivation.)


While this Bachelor interview was playing, I had to go to the bathroom get a snack walk the dog answer multiple calls from multiple suitors.  So I pressed pause on the Tivo a few times during the AWKWARD interview.  Here's what I saw each time....

Why, thank you for asking, Tivo!  I totally knew you get me, and that I should just give up on men and marry you instead, but this just proves it.  You know my needs before I do!  I normally don't have problems with Acid Reflux Disease.  However, I am kinda feeling like I'm experiencing some discomfort right now.  It's kinda like puking in your mouth a little bit?  Yeah.  I think I will click on that ad and see what kind of drugs you have to offer me.  After all, what other cure is there?  I'm certainly not gonna stop watching this show.  That would be ludicrous!